Spider-Pants Tingling!

The Lineup: Peter Parker, Gwen Stacy, and Miles Morales

Fart Factor: 6 out of 10. Gwen doesn't need spider-senses to smell that whopper. Miles thinks it could be from a nearby lurker. And Peter oddly seems nonchalant.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: PLOT TWIST! THE RADIOACTIVE SPIDER

Now Would Be a Good Time To Wave.

The Line Up: Princes William and Harry. Don't know which is which. If I did, that would mean I am gay.

Fart Factor: 4 out of 10. 8 out of 10 if you convert from pounds to dollars.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: The two are notoriously mischievous, so it's hard to say. (Didn't one dress like a Nazi once?) But if I were a wagering man, I'd say the prince to the left. He's younger and it looks like he just finished a one-cheek sneak. Keep a stiff upper lip. Don't ruffle any feathers.