WHOA! That Hurts!

The Lineup: Tiny Keanu, who looks like he really let out a painful one. Large Floating Keanu, who is judging you SO HARD. And Large Floating Morgan Freeman, who regrets to get involved with any of it.

Fart Factor: Pretty huge. Like a 10 out of 10. That fart is so powerful, it's emitting light at the end of the tunnel. And notice how both floating heads are keeping their mouths shut.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: Tiny Keanu better run before those floating heads catch their breath long enough to eat him.

Live From Cleveland

"Chaos begins when the heat rises...from someone's pants."

The Lineup: An EXTREMELY huge Val Kilmer, who's obviously let himself go, and three girls whose names I don't care to learn. And a fan inside the lettering can't blow away the whiff, so they're all screwed.

Fart Factor: A steamingly hot 9. Girl 1 cannot believe it- she just straightened her hair. Girl 2 (Anne Heche?) denies knowing anything about a fart. Girl 3 should really close her mouth. And ginormous Val Kilmer just enjoys the rancid cloud and lets it seep into his beard. And somewhere towards the floor of the room, Willow is gasping his last breath.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: Girl 3. And she's about to let another one, by the looks of it.