SMEL AMI

Finally, a new WFP post! Sorry if I haven't posted since September, but I've been busy playing the lottery and hoarding.

The Lineup: Uma, Kristin, Twilight, and Wednesday. All somehow dressed in the Google logo colors.

Fart Factor: A lukewarm 4. Uma ain't tellin' nobody nuthin'. Kristin looks around to see what smells as bad as "The English Patient." Sparkly boy wishes he could fan out his waistcoat, and Christina wonders what happened to the rest of her neck.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: Google! They do everything now!

Fat Fart in a Little Car.

The Lineup:

Here's an idea: let's pack the family into a '92 Geo Metro and hit the beach! Of course, we all know what that means: today's forecast calls for noxious fumes packed tightly into very uncomfortable surfaces. This group is young but experienced. The gassy older brother with the dumb look on his face is flanked by his annoyed little brother and sister. The younger brother's t-shirt does a bang-up job of enumerating what he's feeling at the moment, and the sister doesn't let her car seat hold back what she thinks of the stench--she's very disappointed. One can only imagine what mom and dad are doing in the front seat. Probably waving newspapers and cranking the AC. Dad's probably slightly proud too. I can picture him hanging his arm out the window in a quiet celebration saying to himself, "now that's what America stands for." Can't say that I disagree.

Fart Factor:

10 out of 10.

Most Likely Fart Subject:

The older brother--With a perfect 10 out of 10 rating, he's our first All-Star farter.