Oxygen Mask, Please

I don't know what it is about Star Trek or William Shatner, but they both end up on this fart blog a lot.

The Lineup: The great, legendary Shatner, and the gremlin from the classic "Twilight Zone" episode.

Fart Factor: 7 out of 10. Shatner is ashamed. Or repulsed. Or distraught. Or terrified. Or wistful. And the gremlin cannot believe Shatner farted.

Most Likely Fart Suspect:KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

Shields Down! And Somebody Crack a Window!

The Lineup: The guy from "In Search Of," the old black woman from "Heroes," and the Priceline Negotiator.

Fart Factor: Warp 7, Captain. We've picked up readings of a noxious methane leak in the cabin, with possible traces of sulfur. Changing scanner frequency to isolate the source.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: Not to narc him out, but I saw Sulu in the break room eating space egg rolls.

Please Open the Airlock.

The lineup: Commander William T. Riker, Counselor Deanna Troi-Riker, and Dr. Beverly Crusher. God, I am such a nerd.

Warp Factor: 6 out of 10. The close quarters of the Starship Enterprise makes for lots of shared moments amongst its crew. Hermetically-sealed airlocks, shields, and narrow passageways keep the crew in a constant asteroid field of poop ghosts. It doesn't help either that if one were to fart in that onesy uniform, the only escape for the bubble would be at the collar. Here on the medical bay, someone has rendered the entire room non-sterile. Is it Riker? He seems distracted but determined to overcome. Counselor Troi's magnificent schnoz looks like it's picking up life signs that aren't hers. And Dr. Crusher? She definitely seems to be shooting daggers (set on kill) at someone.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: Look closely: the always astute Dr. Crusher is pointing her tricorder at the most likely source of the anomoly: Counselor Troi's ass.