Swamp (G)ass

The Lineup: Tommy Lee Jones, John Goodman, and I think that's a black guy(?) in the marshes.

Fart Factor: 8.1 out of 10. Two veteran actors who once bonded over wearing chains around their necks now scowl at each other with flared nostrils and damaged egos. (Or is it flared egos and damaged nostrils?) Meanwhile, Robert Downey Jr. in blackface wades up to his nuts in smelly slime.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: Mary Steenburgen. She had a burrito for lunch.

Unfortunate Album Cover of the Month

*MELODIC LOUD FART*

The Stink of Insoles

Fashion photography has been woefully under-represented on this blog. So today we explore the fart situation of the home page of Florsheim Shoes:


The Lineup: Christian Bale-ish, Girl who looks like a fucking alien, and a younger, thinner Donal Logue.

Fart Factor: A medium 7 out of 10. Christian Bale-ish thought he heard the train's air brakes; Girl with enormous head with wide-set eyes and no ears tries to hurry by the smell, and young Donal Logue regrets not bringing a coat on the long trip.

Most Likely Fart Suspect: Girl with tiny neck that can barely support her gigantic skull